Children writing about the ocean

Children Writing About the Ocean . . .   1)  - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)                                                             2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age  6)                     3) - If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island.  If you don't     have ocean all round you, you are incontinent.   (, age  7)               4) - Sharks are  ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily          Richardson She's not my  friend any more.  (Kylie, age  6) 5) - A dolphin  breaths through an asshole on the top of its head..  (Billy, age  8) 6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a  woman and pot and comes back with crabs.  (Millie, age  6)                               7) - When ships  had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the  ocean. Sometimes when  the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to   make the wind come.  My  brother said they would have been better off      eating beans.  (William,  age 7)                                           8) -  Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and  I like  their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant?      Like,  really?   (Helen, age 6)                                            9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby  brother is always   crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister  has just got    pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age  6)                    10) - Some fish  are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting.  Electric eels can    give you a shock..  They have to live in caves under the sea where I think  they have to plug  themselves in to chargers.                              (Christopher, age  7)                                                      11) - When you  go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes    my willy small.  (Kevin, age 6)                                            12) - On  vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was     going very fast.  She says she won't do it again because water fired       right up her big fat ass.  (Julie, age 7)                                 13)  - The ocean is made up of water and fish.  Why the fish don't drown   I  don't know.  (Bobby, age 6)                                             14) - My dad was a sailor on the ocean He knows all  about the ocean.     What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.     (James, age 7)                                                             If you didn't chuckle at one of these, you need to find a better sense of humour.